Old Men in Hardware Stores

A friend I know has been trained to run Myers Briggs tests - you know the personality thingys? (very scientific of me, I know....)  When I told her what my personality type was, her response was, "Oh, so that explains why you're always late."

Now most people would be insulted by that, but me? I was just happy to hear that I'm not late out of disrespect for other people's time - as many people think - it has something to do with me wanting to maximize every minute.  (I know, I know, that's not exactly what she told me, but that's what I heard (aka wanted to hear) so I'm sticking with it - makes me sound pretty cool, all in all)

So true to form, I had plans yesterday to go to the quarter final CFL game (Arrgggoooossss!!!  (to you non-Torontonians, no matter how much time I spent trying to explain that - you'd never get it - just know that's its sports related) and I was supposed to be there at 12:30 for the 1:00 pm game.  Unfortunately for the person I was meeting, it was the first time she'd ever done anything socially with me (she's from work - and at work, I'm always on time....).

Although I'd gotten up at 8:30 (really early for me on a Sunday) somehow it wasn't until 11:30 that I realised that the hardware store would be closed by the time the game was over, so I had to go right then if I was going to get the drill I needed.  I know, I know I could have gone on the Monday, but I wanted to fix my towel rack and put up my mirror and fix my scarf rack THAT day, not the next.

At least I text to say I'd be 10 minutes late before heading out.  it would have worked if it hadn't been for the old men....

Just FYI?  I guess it's nice that the hardware stores hire retirees (like Walmart...) but NOT when it screws with my day.

There was a special display on drill sets and since I had bought the wrong thing the day before, I really did need to check with someone who knew something about power tools before leaving.  Special display - you'd think it'd be fast, wouldn't you?  But no, apparently Sunday it special retiree day.  Put a retired couple needing a drill in front of a retiree showing all the bells and whistles of two types of drill sets, I was so fucked.  (I was going to say doomed, but really, that's just too pansy of a word.)

So me, the ever-so patient one, stood for about 10 seconds waiting before going to the next aisle to check out drills and see if I could do it myself, which took about 10 seconds for doubt to creep in, so I headed back to the demonstration table and the retirees were waxing on, "This is the best deal ..." yadda, yadda, yadda....

I thought about just picking up one of the cases and heading to the cash, but it just seemed like more than I could ever possibly use.  Twenty seconds in and I couldn't take it anymore, so I went back to aisle and looked at the stocked shelf but instead of dissipating in the 20 seconds I'd been waiting at the table, the doubt I had been feeling had only grown, so I headed back to the table again.

This time, the conversation sounded like it was wrapping up, with the husband of the couple saying, "Well, I'll just pick up one of these boxes."  And in picking up the box, I figured that they were done, but no, I forgot they were retirees, they were only beginning.  Finally the old men stopped talking and I thought it was over but NOoooo, the old woman with the cane chimed in.

And just when I thought I couldn't bear it a moment longer, I hear her saying, "So John saw what I was doing and said, "Honey, I'm going to buy you a new drill.""

So many parts of that sentence caused mini explosions in my brain.  I must have made some kind of sound or moved in some way because the lady happened to notice I was there (FINALLY!!!!!!) and said, "Oh, I think this young girl is waiting."

She called me young, so that gives you a clue as to how old she was.

Now normally I actually have a great deal of patience for the older generation, but I was already late - if I'd only been 5 minutes in the store - which was my plan - I'd have been on time, but the delay of the old couple, plus the delay of the swap over of staff (seriously, I guess they have a quota of one customer per shift....) and then the added delay of the two staff talking about their coffees (I'm still so annoyed, I can't even fully recount what happened, but just know that it added about 10 minutes to my shopping experience) meant I didn't have a hope in hell of being on  time.

I know I should never have tried to make it to the hardware store and back in such a small window of time, but if everything had gone according to plan, I'd have made it.  I just never for a moment thought I needed to plan for the Old Men in the hardware store.

I managed to get my drill and leave without screaming, but I'm pretty sure those guys were unimpressed by my representation of the younger generation.

Sorry y'all.  I just gave us all a bad rep.